Friday, March 16, 2012
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Reviewing a Bad Review
Last week my webcomic, Lucky Dawg, was targeted by the website “The Bad Webcomics Wiki”. After a minute of looking at the site, I instantly knew why I was suddenly targeted. I had just begun advertising on the webcomic Exiern. The “reviewer” apparently has hate for this comic because it’s sexual and they have a pay window, so (God forbid!) the creator can make some money. Seeing that I threw a Project Wonderful ad up there, my comic must be “bad” as well. Up on Bad Webcomics Wiki Lucky Dawg goes.
“Alan Moore surely didn't thought back in 1986 that his groundbreaking deconstruction of the superhero genre Watchmen would set off an avalanche of third and fourth tier copycats rolling over the comic market, burying every classical aspect of the superhero underneath them.
Where classical superheroes were individuals transcending the abilities of the common people, yet always concerned about their sorrows and needs as well as imbued with an indomitable sense of justice, the typical Dark Age Superheroesprotagonists were little more than mindless, musclebound bullies lacking any morals whatsoever who answers to every problem was smashing it to bloody chunks at best and homicidal loons who were downright villains, but could still find some worse to beat up.”
Wow! Mind you, that was only two sentences. If you made the mistake of reading that out loud, I’ll give you a moment to catch your breath from the lack of periods.
“Now that the Dark Age Of Comics has ended (or so we're told by the Big Two), you could think comickers had learned rom the mistakes of the past.”
“Cue Adam J. Monetta.”
Yup. That’s my name. My REAL name. I’m not some ominous poster that won’t put his name on his work, even though it tells you exactly how to do it right on top of the page.
“He's… err… some guy. Who wants to make comics really, really badly.”
“Want”? You ding-dong, I am MAKING comics. It’s why you took the time to write this.
“His other crap comic didn't made the cut at Zuda,...”
BZZZT! Wrong again. It did make the cut. That’s why it was on the site in the competition. Zuda chose me. Blood Hunter won the popularity poll.
“...so he went basically "I'm gonna show my Magna Opi to the whole Internet, so it can realize my Epicness and I get published professionally! Natch!"
First of all, it’s Magna Opera. Come on, kid! The internet is right in front of your face. Take a minute and Google it.
“Way to got, Mister. They chances that your drivel will…”
Hold on. I need a minute to reboot and process this. The gibberish levels are through the roof. Listen, kid, can I offer some advice? Read what you write out loud. It will improve your output greatly. Okay, let’s try this again:
“Way to got, Mister. They chances that your drivel will see a print release not financed out of your own pocket but by some big publisher tend to nil, but I'm going ahead of myself.”
Two words. Robert Kirkman.
Peace.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Phunkin' Photoshop - LiLo in The Grudge 4
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Phunkin' Photoshop - The Human Lots-a-Lots-a-Leggggggs
You've heard of The Human Centipede and either seen it, want to see it or make believe that you never heard of it, ever. Now own the toy, The Human Lots-a-Lots-a-Leggggggs.
(Note to the kids: Since you never grew up in the 80s, and I don't think VH-1 has covered the stupid stuffed caterpillar, you won't know what it is. Used the Stretch Armstrong head because he looks like a kind of douche that should be connected ass to mouth.)
Thursday, December 31, 2009
2009 was pretty good, the past decade.. ehh...
While ’09 was decent enough, the Double-Oh Decade as a whole was kinda “meh”. Worst decade I’ve experience so far. Too young to remember the latter half of the 70s, have some fond childhood memories of the 80s and the 90s were a blast.
Three factors really lead the 00s to be miserable. Bush, 9/11 and Janet Jackson. Bush and the WTC disaster went hand in hand as America has been terrified since 2001. Obviously for a good reason since we still have losers trying to blow their balls off to take down airplanes. Bush used that fear to buy him a second term, which he used to destroy the economy.
Janet Jackson and her stupid nipple sent a wave of censorship throughout entertainment. That edge that was developed during the 90s had to be dulled so it was safe for the kids. Regular radio died because of this. It’s still there, but unless you are under 25 and enjoy listening to the same pop song 25 times a day, it’s really gone downhill. Even my beloved pro wrestling has been made so child friendly that they stop the match if a wrestler accidentally cuts himself.
The past decade was all bad though. The best thing that happened during the past ten years has been technology soaring. Ten years ago, I didn’t think I’d need a cell phone, now I have an iPhone. Big giant bulky TVs and monitors are a thing of the past. Ways to connect with people are evolving and changing every year. And on a creative level, the past decade couldn’t be better.
Webcomics have saved my comic book dream. As a nobody writer with awful artistic skills, I would have no chance in comics ten years ago. I could write a million pitches and the only thing I would accomplish is killing the trees for the paper wasted on those pitches. Ultimately, no matter how good or bad they were, no one would have read them. With the webcomic boom, it is now aware that you can put up pages weekly (heh, hopefully) and people will read them. That is all a true creator can ask for. To be read and/or seen and most importantly, enjoyed. Personally, it’s not about money right now. That can come in time, if ever.
The rise of MMA really helped that violent void that wrestling is currently doing away with. Plus, it’s a legit sport.
Anyway, I’m really looking forward to 2010 and beyond. Lucky & Stranger are quickly nearing the point where I feel it’s time to go to print. I’m going to finally get a website going for them. Not that I’d leave Drunk Duck, but it’s good to have my own brand as well. I also want to do some personal changes to/for myself, but who doesn’t promise themselves that.
So Happy New Year. Hope 2010 is good for you, and if it isn’t, there’s always next year.